Madhatter on Portal

For those of you that don’t know the game. Portal is a new Half Life Game (mod) which pretty much has created for the first time a revolutionary game weapon that can make the player place two portals on certain surfaces and allows the player to walk through them. Hence the name. SO, how was the game?


Well, if your one of those closet gamers that never gets out of your room except for the delightful task of going to school/work just to make your parents feel that you are trying to fit in with societal norms when all you really want is to get back inside so you can get that 3 thousandth frag in quake 3 1on1 against Klesk, then I think you might agree with me on two points.

1. Portal was a game so short that if the community doesn’t get creative with nice maps for it then it can only be seen as a lovely manifestation of the latest “suspense waiting game” for a game that lasted so long that even my microwave popcorn could have outlasted it.

2. The game is too easy, but the real challenge arises at the “challenges” part of the game, which actually weren’t so hard, but by then I had grown so tired of the maps that I didn’t even care to complete all of the challenges.

What about all the new technology, I mean Portal gives us the opportunity to play games in an entirely different way! Isn’t that fancy! Well, from the viewpoint of the gamer, I would say sure, portals are something new and exciting, but they were just used as the sell point for a game that was overall bland, but I was glad I played it. At least we can agree with one thing. All in all the game was remarkably simple, easy and short. So you might be thinking that I hated the game like so many others? No. There is only one reason for this. Who ever in the valvE team developed the charachter for Weighted Companion Cube deserves a medal. That box was made of pure love and emotion. I spent hours online reading about Weighted Companion Cube (note I capitalize the letters due to warm and fuzzy feelings inside me that make me do funny things when ever I think of that <3 cube).

Its not to say this game is not brilliant, the voice acting, the story, the environment, and the end credits were fantastic! Also the advanced maps gave the game some more longevity, but it still had me wanting more (which is arguably a good thing), but in the end I just found myself thinking about the lack of multiplayer maps, where racing with portals could have been extremely fun to try! I recommend you get the game, even though it has a short lifespan if you like games though, because it provides something new, but I don’t recommend you get it if you are expecting hours of fun on end.

For those of you reading this, and have even made it this far, I give you the first of many to come. Fan art brought to you by God I love that cube. Fucking makes portal 20 bucks worth.

God I love that fucking cube. Marry me ;_; cube.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *